A very Shrekmantic love story
by Sullivan Grundy
Summary: This was originally written for an English assignment. But afterwards I decided that I would take my love for Shrek to the next step with another chapter, and another, until I had a full five chapters of story. DISCLAIMER This is NOT the original Shrek is love, Shrek is life story. This is my own telling of the story. I do not claim to own or have written the timeless Shrek classic
1. Chapter 1: My dream come true

**_A very Shrekmantic love story_**

A love poem about Shrek

As I lay there

On my Shrek decaled sheets

I chinch my complete collection of Shrek on DVD to my chest

I stare up at the signed poster of Shrek, Dreaming

I dream of a day where my hero comes for me

I hear my father in the other room

Telling my mother that my "obsession" is wrong

That it is immoral

That our love is impure

And at that moment I smell the sweet scent of onions

This could only mean one thing

"Could it be true?"

"Could my time have come?"

"Could my green-knight in shining armor have finally come for me?"

I look over at my open window

A large, green head peers into my window

Two big, Beautiful, brown eyes pierce my soul

A single tear rolls off my bottom eyelid and down my cheek

A faint smile can be seen on my face

I give my heart and all my being to Shrek

Shrek is love, I whisper

Shrek is life


	2. Chapter 2: A long night of Shrek loving

Shrek climbed through my window

The excitement was too much

I could barely breathe

Shrek pulled his foot through the window

My hands covered my mouth to keep the cries of joy from escaping

Shrek lurched over to me

His eyes, sparkled

His nose flexed with every inhale of oxygen he took

Shrek is finally standing within my grasp

His stomach touches mine

He rests his big, green, masculine hands on my small, frail, boy shoulders

Shrek takes a deep breath

"I've come for you, laddie"

I couldn't hold my excitement anymore

I wrapped my slim arms around Shrek's large, ogre torso

Crying with my face in his warm chest

"That'll do laddie" Shrek said "That'll do"

Shrek swiped aside my bangs with his thumb

He then kissed my forehead

I could smell the distinct smell of onions on his breath

It was almost too much

I almost ejaculated

But I held it back with pure willpower

I knew Shrek would be disappointed if I finished before we started

Shrek picked me up in his big, muscular arms

He carried me over to my bed and laid me down as if I was his newlywed bride

Shrek climbed over top of me and poked my anus with the tip of his shrok

I told Shrek that I'm ready whenever he is

Shrek didn't waste a moment of time

He immediately pushed his ogre-hood all the way in

I grit my teeth and grab the bed sheets underneath me

It hurts, but I do it for Shrek

My eyes begin to tear

A mix of pain and joy

Shrek roars a mighty ogre roar

An immense amount of light-green, onion scented, semen floods my insides

Shrek pulls out half-way thorough and blasts my hips, torso, and face with one shot

My father kicks down the door

He sees Shrek kneeling on my bed with my laying on the bed still having convoluting and spasming

Shrek looks my father in the eye and says

"It's all ogre now."

Shrek sweeps my body into his arms

I'm still limp from the pleasure

Shrek throws an onion smoke grenade and escapes through the window as gracefully as he has entered

I gain some conciseness back

All I see is Shrek gliding through the air holding me tightly in his arms

Shrek is love, I whisper

Shrek is life


	3. Chapter 3: The Fall of A Hero

Shrek soars through the air like a majestic falcon

I wonder how Shrek can fly without wings

But I dare not question Shrek and his ways

Shrek looks down at me and says

"We're almost there, laddie"

I turn my head

I see the most beautiful swamp I ever saw

Shrek begins to descend

But Shrek miscalculated the weight I added

We were going in hot

"Hold on tight!" yells Shrek

I can feel the heat of reentry on my skin

I wonder why we were going through reentry even though we were already in the Earth's atmosphere

But it was too late for that

Shrek holds me tight to my chest and rolls into a ball

The moment Shrek touches ground he rolls

It was remarkable how Shrek was able to turn his downward momentum into forward momentum so quickly and fluently

Shrek does a back flip to finish off his spectacle

I clap to show Shrek my gratitude

"Now that wasn't so bad, now was it?" queries Shrek

I shake my head in agreement

Shrek carries me into his house and lays me on a bed

He kisses my forehead and tells me to get some rest

I slept all through the night

I awake in the afternoon

I hear the sound of people arguing outside

I pop my head out a window

I see Shrek arguing with someone

They appear to be an imp or maybe a hob goblin

No

Wait

It's neither

It's Farquadd

Why is he hear

What could he want with Shrek

None of this adds up

"Get outta my swamp, Farquadd"

Yells Shrek

"Not until I get what's mine"

What could Lord Farquadd want

This makes no amount of sense

I rush outside and go to Shrek's side, where I belong

Farquadd's eyes light up

"There he is!" proclaims Farquadd in his awful voice

Farquadd steps forwards

Shrek puts himself between me and Farquadd

"He isn't going anywhere, Farquadd" says Shrek

"You can't do this, you big ogre" yells Farquadd

Shrek stands up straight

He curls one hand into a fist

He then punched the palm of the other hand

Farquadd flinched

He then played it off as a muscle spasm

Shrek opens his big, ogre mouth

"Let's settle this the old way, Farquadd."

Farquadd simply nods

Farquadd removes his shirt with disgusting flamboyancy

Shrek simply flexes his big, bulging muscles

His entire shirt shreds into sixty thousand pieces

Shrek tells me to step back

I obey Shrek's wish

Farquadd steps into some kind of martial arts stance

Shrek quickly moves into the legendary grappler stance

His slouching posture and out-reaching arms remind me of Zangief

Farquadd wastes no time at taking the first move

He runs at Shrek screaming

Farquadd leaps into the air, shifting his weight to move into a Flying Dragon Kick

Shrek dodges the attack with ease

He then Grabs Farquadd's ankle and does a triple German suplex and combos into A grave stone

Farquadd struggles to get up, but manages

Shrek lunges towards Farquadd

Shrek does a mad back flip, kicking Farquadd in the chin

Farquadd launches into the air

Shrek follows him

Shrek starts doing mad air combos on Farquadd

Shrek manages to get a five hundred hit combo

Shrek goes for an air grab

But Farquadd had anticipated this

He techs Shrek's grab with ease

I can see the surprise on Shrek's face as Farquadd knocks Shrek out of the sky

Shrek hits the ground, hard

Farquadd falls on his feet, next to Shrek

He laughs at Shrek on the ground, all while doing a taunt

But this is what Shrek had hoped for

Farquadd's boasting had given Shrek enough time to recover his energy

Shrek hits Farquadd with a rising tackle

Farquadd soars through the air

Shrek uses instant transmission

He appears behind Farquadd as he flies through the air

Shrek hits Farquadd again, sending him in the other direction

Farquadd slides along the ground

He can see Shrek running towards him at full speed

Shrek does a Power geyser right to Farquadd's face

Farquadd lets out a blood curdling scream

He then denigrates

Shrek stands up, tired and battle-worn

He looks over at me and smiles

A tear rolls from his eye

"Shrek is love" he says

"Shrek is li-"


	4. Chapter 4: An untold history

Shrek's large, hulking body falls to the ground

I run over to his side

Shrek looks up at me

Tears falling from my face

Staining his tunic

Shrek struggles to speaks

"Don't worry laddie, my pain is ogre now."

Shrek puts his cold hand on my cheek

"There's a chest in the house, go find it."

I ask Shrek what is in the chest

He responds by saying "your destiny"

Shrek looks me in the eye

"Stay strong, my little onion, I will always be watching ogre you."

Shrek's hand falls to the ground, kicking up dust

I throw myself at Shrek's chest and weep for an hour

I finally gain the will to stand

I head to the house to find the chest Shrek spoke about

I search everywhere, but to no attainment did I find such a chest

I was almost ready to give up

When I noticed there was an peculiar placement of tree bark on the wall

I move the bark and find a hole

And what was contained in the hole

None other than a chest

The chest had a strange design

None of any kind I had seen

Could it be of a forgotten race

I open the chest, which to my amazement, was unlocked

I peer into the chest, curious of its contents

I see a stunning sword

I pick it up and examine it closely

I notice that this is not just any sword

It is the sword known as Nightstriker

It was forged in O'gre, the most sacred swamp known to the mortal mind

So holy that only the most pure of ogres are allowed to enter

The sword was used by the legendary Green Warrior

The hero of Far Far Away

The hero that protected all who could not protect themselves from evil

But why did Shrek have this

The Green Warrior is only a legend

There's no way that Shrek was The Green Warrior

I search through the rest of the chest

I find a distinct set of ogre armor

Strange, this also resembles the armor worn by The Green Warrior

I find a note

I open the note, carefully

The note reads as follows

"Dear Laddie

If you are reading this, it means that my past has caught up to me

You must go on to take my place and become the savior of this land

You must protect those who are unable to protect themselves

You must become what no man could dream of becoming

I stand, as I fight back tears

I turn to the door, Nightstriker in hand

I find a noble steed tied up in back

I take him and set out to finish what should have ended a long, long time ago

I turn back to the swamp I had come so accustomed to

Shrek is love, I whisper

Shrek is life


	5. Chapter 5: The Climactic End to a Legend

I travel for forty-eight days and sixteen nights

Stopping only to eat and water my noble steed

I come across many misfortunes

But there is no time to help such small happenings

I come across a Dio-esque castle

It seems that a storm only resides at that certain area

I ride my steed up the way of the castle

There are bones and corpses of travelers that came before me

I wonder how many of them were followers of Shrek

I approach the castle gates

Never before have I seen such an intimidating door

But never the less

I enter the castle

I will meet my fate here

Whatever it may be

I'm sure of it

The door creeks when I push it open

It almost sounds as if it was intentional

The inside is more terrifying than the outside

But I push on forwards

My steed's hooves echo with every step he takes

I finally reach my destination

A big room with a single throne at the end

And who sits on the throne

Prince Charming

I expected as much

Given as he and Farquaad had a 'special' relationship

Prince Charming looks at me nonchalantly

"You have finally come"

I step of my noble steed

"I've come to finish this, Charming"

Charming shifts his weight

"What is there to finish, the ogre is dealt with"

I take a single step forward

"What are you talking about"

Charming smirks

"You mean he didn't tell you"

"I'm actually surprised you didn't figure it out yourself"

"It's in your name, Sullivan Farquaad"

I stumble back, astonished

Luckily my noble steed was there to catch me

"W-what, no, you're lying"

"There's no way that could be true"

A somber melody starts up in the back

Charming stands up

"It's true, and you know it"

"Do you think that ogre picked you because you were his most devoted follower"

The melody starts to turn into a guitar solo

I clench my fist

"This is all blasphemy; I'll defeat you and your non-Shrek ways"

Other instruments join in the music

Prince charming lunges towards me

I try to dodge the blow with a side-step

But he's too fast

I close my eyes

Nothing

I open my eyes

My noble steed is between me and Charming

I notice Charming blade in my steed

"Why"

My steed turns his head to look at me

"Because I was just like you back then"

"I would do anything to protect Shrek"

It was at that moment that I realized something

My noble steed was no ordinary noble steed

It's Donkey

I suddenly hear a voice inside my head

"Fear not laddie, for I am by your side"

Shrek's soul resonates within me

I stand up straight, nightstriker in hand

The battle begins

I strike Charming

He blocks the blow

But he didn't expect the sheer power of Shrek's strength that now resides inside me

Charming's sword shatters into 9,871 shards

Rules of Nature Blares in the background

I do a sick Devil May Cry like breakdown on him

I get an SSS rank

Charming falls to the floor

He clenches his side

"H-how could this happen"

"I don't understand"

I sheath my sword

"It's simple Charming; no one compares to the power of our Ogrelord"

I notice the life had left Charming's eyes

I walk over to the throne

As I sit I notice my skin turns a pale green

I know what my fate holds

And I accept it whole-heartily

I rest my head on my hand

"Shrek is love"

I say  
"Shrek is life"

The End


End file.
